If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Randomize
