If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
it's like heaven, but drunker
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
