Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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