Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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