I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize