gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
