I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
