I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
