Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Randomize