Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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