It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize