Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
