long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize