a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
