Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
