i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
