if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
i believe in u and ur pee
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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