is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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