so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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