I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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