we made out on top of his cat.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
