i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize