this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
