He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize