How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Im part way to drunk.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I have post one night stand depression
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
