My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
