no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Randomize
