We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize
