It's like God shit irony all over that family
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
My vagina is very pro this idea
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
