the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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