how can u be prego again
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
