Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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