i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
