You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
