He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
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