don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize