I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
