Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
How naked do you want me to be?
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