Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
