The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize