This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
She even gives head with a lisp.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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