how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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