I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
