I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
