i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Randomize
