Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I have peed in a lot of sinks
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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