guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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