did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize