Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Send help, water and tortillas.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
