but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
i need some magic done to my vagina
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
